We may lose, and we may win
But we will never be here again
Back in the day, I was a big fan of The Eagles. Still am, if you want to know the truth. One line from the song Take It Easy always intrigued me: Don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy. . .
Those words spoke to me even before I’d experienced enough to know the truth in them. Today I realize that’s exactly the problem: I’ve been letting the sound of my own wheels make me crazy. The reverberating noise of life fills my head, clutters my thoughts and makes it impossible to find calm.
I am all half-formed ideas and unresolved issues. I am millions of exposed nerve endings. I am. . .in transition.
During childbirth, transition is the final, most intense stage of labor. A woman in transition might experience nausea, vomiting, burping or hiccups, shaking, hot/cold feelings, fatigue, and sensitivity to touch. Emotionally, she might become restless, irritable, discouraged, and confused. She might focus inward and have a hard time communicating her wishes. This is the point in labor when she usually needs the most support.
I gave birth twice without so much as an aspirin for comfort (20 years ago natural childbirth was the preferred method), and despite all that focused breathing I still recall those moments of transition as helpless tumbling through waves of dizzying pain. It was the closest thing to an out-of-body experience I’d ever known; I seemed to watch and listen from another place completely throughout the process of bringing a new life into the world.
I feel like I’m giving birth once again; not to a person this time, but to an era, a happening, a circumstance. Things are going on around and about me, things to which I am connected and for which I am responsible, but over which I have little influence or power. I’m tumbling again, riding waves with no idea where I will wash ashore or what debris might arrive with me.
Yes, I’m in transition. And I can only hope that the payoff will be as joyous as it was all those years ago in the delivery room. That’s what makes it all worthwhile, right?
In the meantime, I need to take the advice of The Eagles and take it easy. In 30 years their catchy lyric has become more relevant than I’d ever though possible:
Take it easy, take it easy
Don’t let the sound of your own wheels drive you crazy
Lighten up while you still can
Don’t even try to understand
Just find a place to make your stand
And take it easy. . .